Hello again, friends. It has been a solid month since I’ve been on here with you all, and I have to say, I have desperately missed this space. I’ve missed meeting with you all here on the pages of God’s Word, sharing with you all the overflow of what God has taught me.
This past month has been quite possibly the most blessed and the most difficult all at the same time. My husband and I welcomed with joy to this world our first son, Redford Lawrence Wagner, on January 29th, and it has been a whirlwind ever since that day.
Those of you who are moms know exactly what I’m talking about. Had it not been for our wonderful family and friends loving and caring for us so well these past 4 weeks, I’m not sure we would have made it to today. God’s grace and His mercy have truly carried us through, and His love has been expressed to us tangibly through His people. So, thank you. To every single person who has prayed, your prayers have been our lifeline. For every meal that was brought to our door, we could not be more grateful. For every text and phone call to make sure we are doing OK, we have never felt so loved.
We’ve also felt pretty weary at times throughout the past four weeks. Sleep deprivation is no joke. An infant with constant needs can wear you out pretty quickly, and the one thing I seemed to collide with at about week 2 of this new and incredible journey was this:
I need Jesus more than I ever have. I need Jesus more than anything else.
I know it sounds incredibly simple and probably far from profound, but I’ve never been more aware of my need for Him. There have been many times when I could have taken a quick nap while my little one slept, but I found myself realizing in some of those moments how much more I was needed a refreshing from time spent in God’s presence. Don’t get me wrong, there have also been many times that I crashed on the couch for a few blissful moments because I could no longer keep my eyelids open.
Still, my ever-increasing need for Jesus and time spent in His Word have been pressing. But it’s hard. Am I right? If I ever thought it was difficult before to prioritize time in the Word, I could probably double that difficulty now. The few moments I get in between meeting my son’s needs could be spent doing a number of other pressing things, but each day I’m reminded that I have a choice.
And here it is, friends—My words of wisdom for the weary, for the fainthearted, for the tired, frazzled, broken, discouraged, lost, confused, downcast, and anything else in between:
“…then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve…but as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.” Joshua 24:15
I came across this verse once again this morning in my few moments with Jesus—a verse that I’m all too familiar with, a verse that perhaps has lost its luster with its familiarity. But as I pondered these words again this morning, one word in particular stood out to me that never had before.
The word “choose.”
Each and every day, you and I have a choice. We can choose to bow down to the urgent, pressing needs of our moments, or we can choose to bow down to the Creator of them. We can choose to give in to our flesh and emotions, or we can choose to surrender them to our King. We can choose to let the little things get the best of us, or we can choose to offer our best “yes” to Jesus.
I found myself in a time of confession this morning before the Lord, recognizing how often I don’t choose Him in my moments because I get so caught up in lesser things. My affections and my energy get spent on the temporal things of my days, and I forget about the eternal. I was reminded afresh this morning that every single day, I choose whom it is I will serve.
And so do you.
So, who or what will it be today? Your phone? Your busy, demanding schedule? Cleaning the house? Rushing after the urgent? Or running into His presence?
Let us recognize today that He is truly all that we need, and our empty cups are filled to overflowing in His presence. Let us CHOOSE Him above all else today. Let’s sit there at His feet together for just a bit this morning.